The Campaign

 

When long-term congressman Cam Brady (Will Ferrell) commits a major public gaffe before an upcoming election, a pair of ultra-wealthy CEOs plot to put up a rival candidate and gain influence over their North Carolina district. Their man: naive Marty Huggins (Zach Galifianakis), director of the local Tourism Center. At first, Marty appears to be the unlikeliest possible choice but, with the help of his new benefactors' support, a cutthroat campaign manager and his family's political connections, he soon becomes a contender who gives the charismatic Cam plenty to worry about. As Election Day closes in, the two are locked in a dead heat, with insults quickly escalating to injury until all they care about is burying each other.

This movie definitely had moments of hilarity from both Ferrell and Galifinakas. But the laughs were spaced out too far and there was too much down time for an already extremely short movie. Ferrell was back in an Anchorman type role where he was so self-obsessed and oblivious. Galifinakas's quirkiness was awesome at first but kind of grew old. The funniest part of the movie was actually his two kids. The few lines that they let them have had me dying.

I would somewhat recommend people checking out this one. The laughs that were there were huge, but I just wish that there would have been much more of them.

Safety Not Guaranteed

 

When an unusual classified ad inspires three cynical Seattle magazine employees to look for the story behind it, they discover a mysterious eccentric named Kenneth, a likable but paranoid supermarket clerk, who believes he's solved the riddle of time travel and intends to depart again soon. Together, they embark on a hilarious, smart, and unexpectedly heartfelt journey that reveals how far believing can take you.

This was a very cutesy character drama/comedy.  It basically took advantage of the acting of two young, up and comers from two of my favorite shows.  To be honest, I don't even know what their names are but the girl from Parks & Recreation and the guy from The League were great and perfectly quirky enough to make you care and laugh at the same time.  Their chemistry was great together. 

I would definitely recommend people checking this one out.  It's a nice, cute, short movie that is definitely worth your time to check it out at home.

Magic Mike

 

Set in the world of male strippers, Magic Mike is directed by Steven Soderbergh and stars Channing Tatum (Dear John) in a story inspired by his real life. The film follows Mike (Tatum) as he takes a young dancer called The Kid (Pettyfer) under his wing and schools him in the fine arts of partying, picking up women, and making easy money.

I have to admit that this movie was pretty enjoyable for the first hour. They were pretty much mocking the fact that they were strippers and they weren't taking it seriously and what not. The stage antics were pretty funny and so were the backstage stuff. McConaughey was absolutely hysterical. I thought I was going to have to write a gushing review of a movie about male strippers. And then about halfway through they decided to force a lame ass story turning McConaughey into the bad guy owner and have Tatum be all about chasing some girl while "The Kid" developed a drug problem. Very disappointing because this had surprise enjoyment all over it.

I would only recommend people watching the first half of the movie when it is light and funny. The second half of the movie was pretty much garbage. Too bad.

Madea's Witness Protection

 

For years, George Needleman (Levy), the gentle CFO of a Wall Street investment bank, has been living with his head in the clouds. His frustrated second wife, Kate (Richards), has reached her limit taking care of his senile mother, Barbara (Roberts). His teenage daughter, Cindy (Danielle Campbell), is spoiled beyond hope and his seven-year-old son, Howie (Devan Leos), wishes his father were around more. But George is finally forced to wake up when he learns that his firm, Lockwise Industries, has been operating a mob-backed Ponzi scheme and that he's been set up as the fall guy. Facing criminal charges and death threats from the mob, George and his entire family are put under witness protection in the safest place that Brian (Perry), a federal prosecutor from Atlanta, can think of - his Aunt Madea's house down South. As a result, Madea and her live-in brother, Uncle Joe (Perry), find themselves managing a completely dysfunctional family from Connecticut. But as George tries to solve the mystery behind Lockwise's finances, Madea whips the Needlemans into shape using her hilarious brand of tough love. And together, they realize they just might have what it takes to unite George's family, outsmart the mob and change everyone's lives for the better.

This was again just like every other Madea movie. Actually - that's not fair to the other Madea movies. This one was worse. It was the same in that the only entertaining stuff was when Madea was actually on the screen. It was worse in that the usually overly melodramatic main story tried to be funny with Eugene Levy being the patriarch of a family needing witness protection with the no talent whatsoever Denise Richards as his wife. I can't believe that this crap actually made me miss the girl getting beaten and trying to beat her drug problem while losing her job waa waa that is usually carried by Madea popping in every once and a while. Sadly - those appearances couldn't even make this one tolerable.

I wouldn't recommend anyone bothering with this one. It is sad to admit but I'm thinking that the Madea movies have pretty much run their course and they should probably just stop.

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

 

President Lincoln's mother is killed by a supernatural creature, which fuels his passion to crush vampires and their slave-owning helpers.

Poop. Total poop. Not even going to bother writing any more about this.

Did you not read the last paragraph that was as lame as the movie synopsis one? No - you shouldn't see it. Why would you want to see poop?

Seeking A Friend For The End Of The World

 

Seeking a Friend for the End of the World is set in a too-near future where time at once stands still and is slipping away forever.   A 70-mile-wide asteroid is en route to Earth, and the last best attempt to counter it has failed. Also failing is the marriage of soft-spoken insurance salesman Dodge (Steve Carell); the breaking news that the world will end in an estimated 21 days cues his wife to leave him on the spot. Dodge is a man who has always played by the rules of life, while his neighbor Penny (Keira Knightley) is an extroverted woman who hasn't. From these opposite perspectives, both initially choose to navigate the impending end of the world with blinders on. Dodge declines joining his friends in increasingly reckless behavior, while Penny fixates on her relationship issues with a self-absorbed musician. The two misfits meet first when Penny has a rough night and then again when she belatedly delivers Dodge a lost letter. That letter could alter Dodge's future; it's from his high-school sweetheart Olivia, the love of his life. When a riot breaks out around their apartment building, Dodge realizes that he must seek Olivia out before it's too late while Penny makes the decision to spend her last days with family in England. Seizing the moment, Dodge promises to help Penny reach her family if she will provide transport for the two of them in her car immediately. She agrees, and they escape. On the road together, the unlikely traveling companions' respective personal journeys accelerate, and their outlooks - if not the world's - brighten.

I'm stunned at how little fanfare this movie got.  I guess because they stupidly decided to release it in the summer?  I very much enjoyed this movie.  I enjoyed the off the wall quirkiness of it.  I enjoyed both of the main characters and their chemistry together.  I enjoyed the pacing of the movie.  The story did a great job of equally tapping into that fear that everyone of us has on some level that the world will end and how would it happen and making light of it at the same time.  

I would definitely recommend people checking this out.  This movie deserved a lot more attention than it received and it's a very enjoyable catch at home type of movie.

Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted

 

Alex the Lion, Marty the Zebra, Gloria the Hippo, and Melman the Giraffe are still fighting to get home to their beloved Big Apple and of course, King Julien, Maurice and the Penguins are all along for the comedic adventure. Their journey takes them through Europe where they find the perfect cover: a traveling circus, which they reinvent Madagascar style.

I liked this movie much more than the second one. The writers realized that this movie's laughs come much more from the cast of characters on The Penguins Of Madagascar cartoon than the four main characters on the poster above. Sure, Marty and Alex have moments - but honestly does anyone care about the hippo or the giraffe? It's about Skipper and the penguins and King Julien and his posse. There is more than enough of them and King Julien's singing completely steals the show. There are tons of laughs and the movie is short and paced well that you avoid the okay let's wrap this up feeling.

I would definitely recommend people checking this out. It's just as enjoyable for the adults as it is for the kids.

That's My Boy

 

While still in his teens, Donny (Adam Sandler) fathered a son, Todd (Andy Samberg), and raised him as a single parent up until Todd's 18th birthday. Now, after not seeing each other for years, Todd's world comes crashing down on the eve of his wedding when an uninvited Donny suddenly shows up. Trying desperately to reconnect with his son, Donny is now forced to deal with the repercussions of his bad parenting skills.

This was pretty much another one of Adam Sandler's clunkers. There were some laughs sprinkled throughout but it was mostly garbage. The worrisome thing is that he's falling away from the every other movie thing he had going. He did Grown-Ups and Just Go With It which were two of my more favorite movies of his. But this is and Jack & Jill is a horrible twosome to follow that up. This is also a horrible start to Adam Sandberg's post SNL career. I pray he goes on to better than this.

I wouldn't really recommend anyone bothering with this. Even though there were some laughs, there were definitely nowhere near enough to carry the movie.

Chernobyl Diaries

 

Chernobyl Diaries is an original story from Oren Peli, who first terrified audiences with his thriller, Paranormal Activity. The film follows a group of six young tourists who, looking to go off the beaten path, hire an "extreme tour" guide. Ignoring warnings, he takes them into the city of Pripyat, the former home to the workers of the Chernobyl nuclear reactor, but a deserted town since the disaster more than 25 years ago. After a brief exploration of the abandoned city, however, the group soon finds themselves stranded, only to discover that they are not alone...

This movie definitely had moments of optimal creepiness. Enough to keep me watching the whole way through. Unfortunately, the whole story felt sooooooooo forced right from the beginning and as opposed to Paranormal Activity where you get scared that could be happening anywhere, I wasn't as hooked in to this because my brain kept asking why the hell would these people be there in the first place. The other thing was that a lot of the attack scenes were too fast paced and blurry so you would jump at first and then just kind of wait for the attack part to be over.

I wouldn't really recommend that people check this out. There are definitely better options out there. Again - there were good scary moments but the forced story made the whole thing pretty cheesy.

Moonrise Kingdom

 

Set on an island off the coast of New England in the summer of 1965, "Moonrise Kingdom" tells the story of two twelve-year-olds who fall in love, make a secret pact, and run away together into the wilderness. As various authorities try to hunt them down, a violent storm is brewing off-shore -- and the peaceful island community is turned upside down in more ways than anyone can handle. Bruce Willis plays the local sheriff. Edward Norton is a Khaki Scout troop leader. Bill Murray and Frances McDormand portray the young girl's parents. The cast also includes Tilda Swinton, Jason Schwartzman, and Jared Gilman and Kara Hayward as the boy and girl.

I'm sorry.  I just don't get Paul Anderson movies.  They always have the greatest reviews and I'm told how hysterical they are - but I am pretty much done with them after like 20 minutes.  This one was no different.  Turned it off due to other movies to watch and totally not into this movie at all.

I wouldn't recommend it but I don't know that you should go off of me on these because I think all his movies are lame. 

Prometheus

 

Ridley Scott returns to the genre he helped define, creating an original science fiction epic set in the most dangerous corners of the universe. The film takes a team of scientists and explorers on a thrilling journey that will test their physical and mental limits and strand them on a distant world, where they will discover the answers to our most profound questions and to life's ultimate mystery.

This movie started off incredibly sci-fi. I was doing nothing but thinking how wrongly advertised it was because they made it out to be like Aliens when it was a lot more like Alien. It took a good hour (the first half of the movie) to get to the alien interaction stuff. I wasn't bored because I like sci-fi stuff like this but the mainstream movie goer absolutely would be. Once the alien stuff started - the movie picked up in pace tremendously. It was creepy as hell and made you jump numerous times. They had took enough time building up the characters so that you care what is happening to them. It still got a little bit too sci fi for the average movie goer towards the end but it was a huge turn around from the beginning.

I would definitely recommend this movie simply because the visuals throughout the movie are amazing. Just be warned that it is not as actiony as advertised and it's much more of thinking man's movie. I enjoyed it very much but was a little confused towards the end. If not for that - I would probably be raving about this movie.

Rock Of Ages

 

Rock of Ages tells the story of small town girl Sherrie and city boy Drew, who meet on the Sunset Strip while pursuing their Hollywood dreams. Their rock 'n' roll romance is told through the hits of Def Leppard, Joan Jett, Journey, Foreigner, Bon Jovi, Night Ranger, REO Speedwagon, Pat Benatar, Twisted Sister, Poison, Whitesnake, and more.

So the story was pretty much fluff. I kind of knew that going in. Regardless, I loved the music because this was the music I grew up to. I loved the random hilarious laughs sprinkled throughout and Tom Cruise was again awesome in a supporting off the wall role. I wish he would just stick to stuff like this.

I would absolutely recommend anyone who grew up with this music see this movie. Its basically like watching people on screen do karaoke for two hours and to be honest - I was singing along with them the whole time.

The Raven

 

The macabre and lurid tales of Edgar Allan Poe are vividly brought to life - and death - in this stylish, gothic thriller starring John Cusack as the infamous author. When a madman begins committing horrific murders inspired by Poe's darkest works, a young Baltimore detective (Luke Evans) joins forces with Poe in a quest to get inside the killer's mind in order to stop him from making every one of Poe's brutal stories a blood chilling reality.  A deadly game of cat and mouse ensues, which escalates when Poe's love (Alice Eve) becomes the next target.

Not going to really bother here.  The movie is a total snoozefest.  I pretty much stopped paying attention like 30 minutes in.  There was no hook to this movie whatseover.

I wouldn't recommend anyone bothering.  Like I said . . . . snoozefest.

Dark Shadows

In the year 1752, Joshua and Naomi Collins, with young son Barnabas, set sail from Liverpool, England to start a new life in America. But even an ocean was not enough to escape the mysterious curse that has plagued their family. Two decades pass and Barnabas (Johnny Depp) has the world at his feet�or at least the town of Collinsport, Maine. The master of Collinwood Manor, Barnabas is rich, powerful and an inveterate playboy...until he makes the grave mistake of breaking the heart of Angelique Bouchard (Eva Green). A witch, in every sense of the word, Angelique dooms him to a fate worse than death: turning him into a vampire, and then burying him alive. Two centuries later, Barnabas is inadvertently freed from his tomb and emerges into the very changed world of 1972. He returns to Collinwood Manor to find that his once-grand estate has fallen into ruin. The dysfunctional remnants of the Collins family have fared little better, each harboring their own dark secrets.

I'm kind of torn on this movie. I enjoyed watching it but I'm pretty sure that it was solely based on Johnny Depp's charisma. He's part of an elite group of actors that I find it almost impossible to not enjoy his work. If it were anyone else in this movie, I probably would have pulled the plug on it for pretty much not caring about the story because there really isn't a hook that keeps you attached. It's just that it's Johnny Depp. There are laughs and it's pretty well paced, but honestly - it's just kind of there. And there was no reason for this to be a summer release. None at all.

Again - I enjoyed it because I like Johnny Depp . . . . . . especially when he is working with Tim Burton. But take him out of this movie and it's really not too good of a movie. Sorry, I can't really do much better than that.

People Like Us

People Like Us is a drama/comedy about family, inspired by true events, starring Chris Pine (Star Trek) as Sam, a twenty-something, fast-talking salesman, whose latest deal collapses on the day he learns that his father has suddenly died. Against his wishes, Sam is called home, where he must put his father's estate in order and reconnect with his estranged family. In the course of fulfilling his father's last wishes, Sam uncovers a startling secret that turns his entire world upside down: He has a 30-year-old sister Frankie whom he never knew about (Elizabeth Banks). As their relationship develops, Sam is forced to rethink everything he thought he knew about this family--and re-examine his own life choices in the process.

This movie is the definition of just being there. I didn't care one iota what was going on. There was no hook to any of the characters. The trailer pretty much summed up the movie from beginning to end. So much so that I didn't even bother watching the last 15-20 minutes because I would rather get some errands done on my way to work.

I wouldn't recommend anyone wasting their time with this. Watch the commercial and base how you thought the movie was on that.